Adventures in Hiring a Babysitter

When I was eleven, I took a Red Cross certification course in babysitting and first aid, made cute little fliers advertising my services and waited for the calls to pour in. (I know! eleven sounds young, but I pretty much emerged from the womb as this maternal, mature little person... not that you'd ever guess that now...)

So anyway, the calls did come in.

My prices were reasonable at one dollar per hour per kid.

My first call came that day and was for a job to watch a two month old and a toddler. The lady on the other end of the line wanted me there that night.

To this day I cannot fathom hiring an eleven! year old to babysit a two month old, but I quickly learned that this woman was beyond wacky.

Long story short, I ended up leaving that job very early, not getting paid and my mom was cautious about sending me out on any more "jobs".

The jobs I did take, I took seriously. I played with kids until they were too tired to open their eyes any longer, then I cleaned everything in the house I could - to include dishes in the sink from long before I arrived. I did this at every job. But that is hardly the point of this post.

Today, the things I go through to secure a babysitter are simply dumbfounding. And still, I notoriously have to cancel plans because I cannot find a babysitter.

I have no idea what I'm doing wrong. I am flabbergasted and I seriously need help.

I.need.your.help. Please, Internet. Help me.

To set the stage and give you as much information as I can:

Josh and I have no family in the area. We have friends. But most of our friends have kids of their own and it is not convenient for one of them to come over to watch the kids.

I guess the boys are getting to the transportable age where they can crash anywhere, but I always felt things would run more smoothly if they could be put to bed in their own room. We have rarely asked friends to watch our kids. (Maybe that's part one of my problem??)

When Grant was a baby, I began by asking his teachers at school to babysit. I asked them then (in 2004) what they charged and the consensus was always $10 per hour.

That seemed decent enough for us. And we were immediately at ease knowing that a teacher from their school would be there. They would know each other, etc.

Great.

But then it became a planning-in-advance nightmare to even get on their schedule. So once we had an "appointment" for a sitter, we made sure to have their favorite dinner available, along with their choice of (non-alcoholic) beverage.

We had everything for the baby prepped and ready to go, usually leaving the sitter nothing more to do than read a story, sing a song, and tuck them in.

We figured we knew the stakes! We had to be great and cool and easygoing so they would want to babysit for us and so that they would share the positive energy with our kid.

Betcha didn't think we were that smart, huh?

We were strategic planners! No way we could lose at this babysitter gig.

[cue foreboding music]

Getting a sitter when Grant was a baby was hard, but nothing compared to how it's been this last year.

So, smarty pants...

• the boys are always (so they've always told me) well-behaved for the sitters;


• we are always home when we say we will be;


• (there was that one time I came home rip roaring drunk on New Years Eve, but Josh was sober and I just went upstairs - no embarrassing moments there.)


• I always usuallyalmostalways pay over $10 per hour by rounding up generously. (If we are gone for three hours, I pay $40, etc.)

It seems like an okay job for a sitter to take. At least from my perspective.

On my end, I am usually slightly annoyed to come home to dinner dishes (theirs) still on my table, the kids crap thrown everywhere, and the said sitter sitting on my couch watching TV- having made no attempt at picking up.

(A (former) friend used "remind" me that I was paying them watch my children, not pick up my children's messes. We agreed to disagree on that point. If the mess is made while they are there.... anyway...)

I'm digressing.

Maybe it's just that I start the entire process all wrong.

I usually call one sitter and leave a message. I will then wait a day or two to hear back from her. If I don't hear back I call again and iterate the urgency in which I need her response or I will have to call someone else.

But by then I've already lost three days waiting to hear that she can't do it.

Lather, rinse, repeat with girl number 2.

Ultimately, I will go through this until the last minute only to never find anyone and cancel my plans.

One of my questions is: do people just call a gaggle of girls all at one time and the first one to call back gets the job? That always felt rude to me... maybe it's not????

Let's visit "today", real quick okay.

Sunday: I call (then text) girl #1. No response.

Today: I text girl #2. No response.

A few hours later: I text girl #3. This one (bless her 15 year old sweet heart) texted me right back and unfortunately she's busy but offered up another day that she was available.

(I should point out that girl #3 is a total exception to everything else that I'm bitching about here. She is the sweetest girl ever, but she's young and inexperienced and I believe she's capable, but I still get nervous. I try not to use her if I think the boys will be awake for a while because I worry about their potential to overwhelm her. Having said that, she really wants to babysit so she acts more professional and mature and responds quickly.)

#1 and #2 are older and are teachers at my kids' school and I'm generally very comfortable with their ability to handle anything that may happen.

But, THEY NEVER CALL ME BACK. And when they do, it's very hollow excuses. (Seriously, #2's dad has had two birthday's this year... I think she forgot that she had already used that one with me...)

[cue the whiniest voice you can imagine]

I'm just getting really pissed off at these older, more experienced girls ignoring me. They are nice enough in person, but geez! Is it too hard to just call back and say no right away? Or text?

I don't believe that my boys are horrendous for sitters. I always have food and drinks and tell these girls to help themselves to anything (which they do), my house is clean, we are home on time, we offer up movies and TV and (in some cases) computer time when the kids are asleep.

I know I said all this already, but I just don't know what else I could do differently.

I don't get why these girls don't want to babysit for me. Am I not paying enough? Is there potentially something I am unaware of? What is the process here? Am I too nice? Not nice enough?

I could honestly scream about the whole thing.

Please someone show me the light and explain to me what I am doing wrong. Mommy and Daddy need a night out! wwwwhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!

[end whining and begging and pleading]

Babysitters these days have us by the proverbial balls and they know it...

Oh, and as a side note, once in 2006 it was actually cheaper for me to fly my mom into town for a whole weekend and babysit Grant for my Christmas party than it would have been to pay a babysitter for a super long babysitting gig..... groan